You come to me, on the day of my slightly cringe Apple Replay release?

My top 10 songs aren't bad when you have the context I swear!!!!!!!!!

BTW: Yung Gravy doesn’t have a single song where he needs to be in anyone’s top artists like that !

If you’re reading this, I’m so sorry you had literally nothing else to do. To be honest, I probably should have had a substack a lot sooner if I wanted to be taken seriously as a writer, but if you follow me on Twitter, you know that dingy little sailboat never had a chance of even docking.

Maybe two weeks ago, someone I follow on Instagram posted to their story that they get offended when someone uses “what kind of music do you listen to?” as an ice breaker and I thought it was funny because girl what??? But they went on to explain that sometimes it can be a really personal thing to share with a stranger. That didn’t really resonate with me — until I saw some of the more…….. cringey individuals who snuck into my Apple Replay this year. So below is brief, albeit necessary !TO ME! context for my alleged Top 10 songs of 2022 in reverse order.

10. “That’s Where I am” by Maggie Rogers

I’m going to be real, this one doesn’t check out — you will see her again later in this list but that one makes perfect sense. To “Belinda Says” by Alvvays (from their new album Blue Rev which dropped just a little over a month ago. very good, go listen) and “You’re Not The One” by Sky Ferreira, my beautiful tied-for-no. 11s, I’m so sorry and would absolutely support a recount!!!!

9. “Crash” by Charli XCX

It’s not that I don’t enjoy it obviously, but I think this one benefited from my workout playlist bias. It’s not my no. 1 or even no. 2 from the album it shares a title with. In a just society, “Lightning” is sitting here instead. One of my favorite albums released in 2022, regardless.

8. “Plan B” by Megan Thee Stallion

Probably also benefited from the workout playlist boost, but a well deserved one. Hello? She’s talking so much shit to an ex(es) over a sample of “Freak N’ You” by Jodeci ft. Wu-Tang Clan. And Tory Lanez count your fucking days!

7. “Long Story Short” by Taylor Swift

And there it is — my cringey-est, most divisive, and probably most personal replay of 2022. Oddly, I don’t think I played this song much past May? I know everyone feels the way they feel about Miss Private Jet Fossil Fuels Environmental Terrorist, and my little list is not likely to change your mind, but Evermore (along with its sister album, Folklore) is truly a career re-defining release. It explores themes of conflict resolution in various forms: friendships, romance, even professional relationships. And without going into too much detail, this album — along with my therapist LOL— did a lot of the heavy lifting in 1. my healing from heartbreak for the first time and 2. eroding the bitterness I carried from being laid off from a job I worked my ass off at that people still associate me with nearly two years later — both of which happened in 2021. Forgive the corniness, but in a year of excess lonely moments for me, “Long Story Short” was a soft reminder that the other side really does exist. So yes, long story short it was a bad time, reader!!!!

6. “Little Things” by Big Thief

I did a lot of driving in 2022, and this probably would have been higher on the list if it wasn't six minutes long. And while the roads through the Tennessee Valley know my secrets better than my childhood best friend at this point, I have grown really fond of Road Trip-Core, which “Little Things” perfectly embodies. This song soundtracked my journeys this year — a lot of which were to somewhere new for the first time. In fact, I traveled more in 2022 than I have in the last 5 years combined so this one feels special. And btw?? get your ass up and work take those vacation days, they exist for a reason.

5. “Cruel Summer” by Taylor Swift

Would you think this is cooler if I told you it’s produced by resident cool girl St. Vincent??? Even people I know who don’t enjoy Taylor Swift admit this is sugary pop perfection. I can’t apologize for it idk idk!

4. “Want Want” by Maggie Rogers

As Maggie Rogers so plainly put it when this song dropped last summer: “This song is about sex. No real other way to say it.” After a couple years of hell for all of us, a record about finally surrendering to our desires without shame felt like the perfect anthem for 2022. There was once a time when I listened to this and personally interpreted it as reassuring commentary on coming out or struggles with sexuality, and it got a lot of 2 a.m. kitchen dances from me. Also, at the risk of sounding Pitchfork pretentious™, “If you’ve got another hour, I want all of it” is such a terse, blink-or-you’ll miss it lyric, but beautifully captures that intimate early excitement of infatuation with dating someone new. And I regret to inform you, this substack is generally pro-horny anthems :(

3. “Honey Dew Fade” by Harry Zimm

At least one song local to North Texas has made its way to my top 10 every year since 2019. I first saw this band live at SXSW in 2018 and was immediately smitten, so you can imagine how excited I was when they sent me this song for feature consideration at the top of the year. Sometimes a song bangs so much that it doesn’t matter if it’s a gorgeously warm love song waving to you at a time when the heartbreak has you pulling into day six of not washing your hair — it’s that good.

2. “As It Was” by Harry Styles

Listen, I like this song just fine, but I am convinced the only reason it’s no. 2 is because I fell asleep with my airpods on once and this was on repeat. I know, I know: a likely story!!!! It was a successful shift in sound for him though and he’s probably about to queerbait his way to a Grammy for Harry’s House with or without my streams so does it really matter bitch???

1. “New Shapes” by Charli XCX feat. Caroline Polachek and Christine & The Queens

Crash was one of my favorite albums released this year and not just for the yas slay queen hunty the house down Charli XCX snatch my wig reasons. This is another strangely personal track for me, and I would argue also deeply personal for our generation’s Edgar Allen Poe herself. The song is a flawless thesis statement for this ~season~ of my life (is that christian cultural appropriation?), but also for the pivotal moment that Charli XCX’s career is staring down right now. After fulfilling her end of a decade-long major label contract (a record label she has been outspoken about not understanding that she’s been running laps around everyone else in pop music for a long time, I might add), she has a choice to settle once again, or regift herself the rejection as a reward. “New Shapes” not only masterfully welds the two sounds she has weaved in and out of her entire career (label-friendly mainstream pop vs. underground stan-starved hyperpop), but it’s also reclamation at its core, converting the battle scars into yassified badges of honor — and unfortunately I was among her strongest soldiers in that regard this year.

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